It is a powerful notion

Every once in awhile my husband gets a GEM of an email that I can't resist sharing.

Undergrads. So naive. So clueless.

Here's the email:

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I received a non-pass. I feel as if it was because I was unable to properly express my thoughts into words for the essay on God. It's very difficult to do so in such a short period of time (people have been unable to prove Anselm for centuries, let alone a month), and I feel as if I could prove my belief that Anselm's Ontological Argument is, in fact, correct to you... if you would be willing to consider taking time out of your schedule to lend me your ears and eyes, and, if I did convince you, be willing to look into the situation of my grade.

After all, you are a philosophy teacher who is interested in the betterment of the soul by attaining knowledge. Does this not sound like an enticing philosophical offer?

Let me know when and if you're ready to believe in God.

It is a powerful notion.

Thank you for your time,
(Name has been removed to protect the ridiculous)
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Justin's response:

Dear _______,

It's almost September. As a philosopher, I would love to hear your take on Anselm's argument. Having a discussion about the existence of God would surely contribute to the betterment of both of our souls. However, as a professor, it's part of my job to make sure students learn how the real world works. You can't do an assignment three and a half months later and expect your grade to change. So, although it does sound like an enticing philosophical offer, it is not an administrative option. Nice try. (P.S. I've believed in God ever since the day I wrote a paper on Anselm in my first intro class. You're right- It IS a powerful notion.)

Sincerely,

Justin Clark
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Priceless.